The Guilt Trippers

You want to know why your parents are so good at guilt tripping you about something? It's because we, as parents or soon to be parents, are guilt tripped about everything and eventually it becomes second nature. We don't even know we are doing half the time...the other we are doing it on purpose because we know it's the only way to get you to do something. Damn it. 

It's starts pretty early in our parental career. Family, friends, and strangers feel it's okay or even necessary to start the guilt as soon as pregnancy strikes. When you are pregnant it is apparently everyone's business what you eat, what you wear, how you exercise, I even had a co-worker criticize my choice of prenatal vitamin! Just a FYI: as long as you are talking to your doctor your pregnancy does not have to be a giant list of you can't do. 

It's gets worse throughout your pregnancy. My hater from the previous post had an issue with my decision to have a gender reveal party. And made it perfectly clear. For some reason people believe that it's okay to be an asshole about things they don't agree with. But hey, that's life. Other people tried to make bad that they couldn't buy us gender specific clothes or toys as if I was forcing them to buy us anything. Gifts are not obligations so why I'm being guilt tripped??

Plan on taking a pregnancy class? Oh have fun with that! Hopefully you don't plan on getting an epidural because it seems that every class aimed towards pregnant women are run by hippies. Listen ladies, if you choose the drug free way that's totally fine but not everyone does so chil out. You also don't get a medal that says "I said no to drugs" and you just sound obnoxious every time you try to tell someone. I personally got an epidural and it was wonderful. It helped with my high blood pressure and kept me calm when ultimately I had to have a c-section. Which brings me to my next guilt trip that needs to stop. Not everyone can have a vaginal birth. In my situation, I was in labor for 28 hours, dilated almost 6 inches, and my son was not dropping. A few scares with the baby's low heart rate and a couple minutes with an oxygen mask on and off and my decision was pretty easy. Don't try to tell someone that a c-section is anything other than what it is. Another option. It doesn't make you a failure or a bad mother. 

And you know what? Let's stop with the breast is best talk around people that can't breastfeed. Breastfeeding is HARD and at times exhausting and again, not for everyone. My son was taken away from me pretty quickly and sent to the NICU with low blood sugar. I wasn't allowed to see him until 12 hours later so obviously he was given bottles. It's a very personal thing and I struggled with my difficulties for a really long time. With lactation consultants, le leche groups, and Facebook pages basically telling you that you're a failure if you don't breastfeed a girl can lose her mind. Our hormones are out of whack enough without the guilt tripping so please back off. 

Now you have your baby and all is back to normal, right? Wrong. Did you have a boy? Well have fun with the decision to circumcise because, like breastfeeding, complete strangers feel it is okay to flat out ask you about this. We all have at least one friend that is dying to tell you that you are a bad parent for vaccinated our kids. Oh and I hope you don't need two incomes to support your family because the woman is meant to stay home with the baby! Now, I work from home as an independent contractor and I still get the guilt. I can't afford to spend every waking moment teaching my son French or sight language so I'm just the worst mother ever. ::eye roll:: 

My son is almost 4 months old and I honestly don't get surprised anymore with the incredibly personal and private things that people have deemed acceptable to not only discuss but judge me on or try to guilt trip me about. I can only imagine what the next few years have in store. If you are guilty of guilt tripping try to remember that everybody is different and you may not know someone's back story. For all you know, that little thing you're guilt tripping about may be the one thing she cries about at night.