Tired as a Mother

Tonight I sat in my car, parked outside my condo, listening to music for 45 minutes and no one noticed. My eyes glazed over, fixated on the world outside that I no longer wanted to be a part of.

This past week has been hell. My toddler was sick, my marriage is unraveling, and my newborn has been well, a newborn. I'm roughly three weeks postpartum and I'm a wreck. Violent temper tantrums, attempting to learn a whole new human being, and watching whatever connection I had had left with my husband slip away... somehow, somewhere I lost my will. My will to live, to love, to try...

I, like most of the human race, have always had my moments of ups and downs. And I'm sure people will just say that this is all about the hormones but I have reached my limit. I'm losing temper with my son instead of helping him through his tantrums. I'm feeling invisible with my husband, incredibly lonely even when he is in the same room. I'm hurt that most people aren't reaching out to say hi and at the same time annoyed with the ones that are. When I'm alone with my daughter the time is gone in an instant and at a snail's pace when husband gets home. We sit, staring at our phones line mindless idiots with nothing to say to each other but cheap small talk. I let my guard down and spill just an ounce of what I'm dealing with and I'm left feeling empty and even more alone.

Don't get me wrong, I love my husband. There are some things that he is the absolute best at and I could not have asked for a better father for my children. However, we are just like any married couple and after years together there is a lot of scar tissue. Daily reminders of old wounds that occasionally hurt and can still be excruciating in the right situations.

I find myself wondering more often than not, why am I here? Would anyone really, honestly care if I am gone? No, I am not suicidal - though I have struggled with depression all my life and yes, there have been times that I have contemplated it. But I love my children and I would never do that to them. I'm juat curious to what would happen, how would people go about their lives...if the last 45 minutes have anything to say about it then the answer is they wouldn't even notice. The world would keep spinning, my husband would keep snoring, and my kids would be blissfully unaware that anything is wrong.

People talk about the joys of motherhood and social media allows us all the build the perfect life that everyone is jealous of. We all share our happy moments and perfect pictures of everyone smiling - neverind it took ten minutes and two meltdowns to get! And when we do complain? Oh, half the time it's about how perfect we moms have to be because our husbands don't help with the kids or the house. We bitch that our husbands don't lift a finger while praising ourselves as self proclaimed super heros...super mom's. But what we are really doing is setting ourselves and other women up for failure. Let's start being honest with how shitty it can be to be a mother. When your kid has a meltdown in public...what are people thinking or even saying out loud? "Why isn't the mother (fill in judgemental comment)" Half the time dads are praised just for being in the picture! My husband is so hands on when it comes to our kids, it's really great. I'm so appreciative of how much he does for me and our children...but...do you know how many times I've heard "he is such a great dad"? More times than I can count. Now, want to know how many times I've been told that I'm such a good mom? I can count on one hand and still have fingers available to hold a coffee...or wine, whatever.

It's pounded into our silly sleep deprived brains that being a mom means we have to do it all. Mom groups, movies and the perfect social media life all need to just STFU already. Just because you can, doesn't mean you should. And just because you have help, whether that's a nanny or your husband, doesn't mean you should feel like shit. Mom guilt is strong in the world and I'm too tired to give a shit anymore.

✌️✌️

MEternity...No One is THAT Stupid, Right?

Oh Meghann Foye – you sweet naïve little girl. You actually DO get a version of this “MEternity” you so desperately want…it’s called vacation time and every working adult gets it.

Welcome to the new America – the whining, bitching, everyone wants a free handout country that was once the place that people looked to. I’m sure Miss Meghann has heard this all before but maternity is NOT a vacation. It is in no way fun, exciting, or “ME” time. Let’s take a look at my maternity leave…I was forced to take early maternity leave due to high blood pressure and my stress level. I spent the last month of my pregnancy painfully driving back and forth to the doctor for checkups, tests, and monitoring. Then after the birth of my baby (I took the 8 weeks required by my doctor due to my C-section for my body to heal which is why we "get" maternity leave in the first place) I spent every day sleep deprived, not eating, stressed about bills (you only get about half your paycheck), and believing that I was doing every single thing wrong. I love my son to pieces and I would never change a thing but if you knew how difficult it is to learn why a baby is crying every 10 fucking minutes you would not be complaining that we get a long vacation. I spent my entire day in a haze because I didn’t sleep for days – I needed to feed the baby, change the baby, pump the breasts, eat? (well even when my appetite returned I barely had time to eat), attempt to sleep but even when my baby WAS sleeping I still thought he was crying. Oh I’m loving this 2-month VACATION.

Oh Miss Meghann – did I mention the mental breakdown a lot of us new mothers face? I personal suffered from post-partum anxiety right on the border of past-partum depression. Something that is just now being brought into the public eye and but barely opening discussed for fear of being judged and mommy shamed. Oh yes – what a fabulous vacation just full of ME time.

Yes, we do “get” to leave work on time or sometimes early for parenting reasons but let me assure you that it is no excuse and typically not an enjoyment. We have to wake up early, get everyone ready, sit in traffic, drop off at school, hope we get to work on time, run errands at lunch or work through lunch, get everyone to practices, attend school functions, pay a bloody fortune on daycare – clothes – food – school necessities – school functions – etc., stress about saving enough money for college, play dates, birthday parties, parent-teacher meetings, the list goes on and on and on and that’s just for the kids…mind you we still have to keep the house together and our marriages fresh. Don’t forget that we spent a couple of months with half our paycheck so new moms are playing catch up! And if you’ve read my other posts you would know about all the mommy shamers and guilt trippers we constantly have to ward off. You complain that you want to be able to leave work whenever you want so you can sip margaritas and bitch to your friends about that dumb guy that blew you off – friends? I can’t remember the last time I was able to go out with a friend and not have it based on the children. I can’t even remember the last time I was able to go out with just my husband! 

It’s your choice to have kids or not to have kids – I have no judgment towards people that choose not to have children but don’t you dare complain that I get to have a vacation that you are not awarded. You get vacation time just like everyone else and typically sick days as well. Mothers are usually using their sick time and vacation days for doctor appointments or mid-day school meetings/engagements. Even if we are actually sick, our household still needs to function. You can call out of work any time you’d like and lay in bed all day or go out with your friends until all hours of the night. You can pick up and go anywhere for the weekend, hell – you can pick up and leave your house in ten minutes if you’d like with no care in the world or stress that you have enough snacks to keep someone busy or if there will be enough nap time to not have to deal with a slangry (sleep angry…huh? Huh? Lol) baby. 

 

Meghann Foye – as a non-parent, your whole God damn life is a vacation. And by the way…you don’t hear men bitching about maternity or paternity leave. Grow up little girl. Open your eyes to the real world and stop looking for the hand out. 

Mommy Shaming - The Real War on Women

We all know how judgmental women can be, there is no denying it. Worst of all, we judge each other as if our words and opinions were the end all be all. You, as a woman, wake up and are instantly judged – you criticize yourself and pick apart your body, hair, wardrobe, or whatever you’re insecure about. And then you leave your house, possibly feeling awful or maybe you’re feeling it today. You think you look so good, you feel confident, and you’re rocking hard. Go you! Leave the house and BAM! The judgmental bitchiness that is life begins. Women will judge other women by any and every aspect of their being. Hair, nails, make up, clothes, shoes, car, house, personality, pet, boyfriend, girlfriend, friends, job, etc. etc. – the list goes ON AND ON.  As a child that was bullied throughout school, I’ve experience almost every kind of judgment(mostly because I didn’t give a shit and wore what I wanted, talked to who I wanted, and didn’t care who had money and who didn’t – side note: I grew up in a “well off” neighborhood and I treated the “poor kid” the same as the “rich kids” because let’s face it…it was all our parent’s money…a bunch a paper that doesn’t even belong to us) We all get bullied in one way or another - we all have at least one person that talks shit to our faces or behind our backs. It will always be a constant - never changing, always revolving pool of toxic people. 

However, now as an adult I’m experience what I personally think is the worst kind – Mommy shaming. 

My son is almost 9 months old and I’ve already had to deal with a world of mommy shaming. As women, we get pressure from all sides all the time. First it’s: When you are you getting married??? You’re not getting any younger, you’ve got to settle down, oh I don’t think he is the right type of guy for you! Oh wow congratulations on the engagement! When is the wedding?? Don’t wait too long, oh you shouldn’t choose those colors, I wouldn’t have chosen that dress.  What a beautiful wedding! When are you going to have a baby? You’re not getting any younger, you don’t want to be too old. Yay, congrats on the baby! Oh God, you aren’t going to eat that? You should only eat/drink/wear this. You shouldn’t exercise – only do this exercise. You shouldn’t drink at all! Oh what a beautiful baby! He/She is SO adorable. When are you having another one?? 

And of course once you have a baby people feel the need to share their opinions on everything. In a previous post we learned about the guilt trippers and I thought those people were just awful. But, wow, I didn’t know what awful was until I met the shamers. Mommy shamers try to push their advice on you, like guilt trippers do, but their real desire is to tear you down. Mommy shamers attempt to discredit each decision you make and want you to know just how wrong your choices are. Not because you’re making bad decisions…but because you are making different decisions. Mommy shamers don’t stick together – because no two people believe the exact same things. Sorry, but if your bestie is a mommy shamer sooner or later you will be smack dab in the middle of her hate. Or perhaps you already are – 

-----To the shamers, everyone is always wrong and they are always right. Why aren’t you breastfeeding?? I can’t believe you’re breastfeeding or STILL breastfeeding. How could you circumcise your baby? You didn’t get him circumcised?? Oh, you use THOSE diapers? You feed him non-organic food? You don’t MAKE his food? JUICE??? I would NEVER let my child act like that! Isn’t he too small/young/big/old for that?----

Usually a “that’s gross” “just saying” “WOW” and the ever popular eye roll will accompany criticisms like these above.  

It’s important for all women, whether you are a judger, a guilt tripper, or even mommy shamer (admit it…we all fit into one of these categories – even if it’s just a little), that we are all in a really difficult position and doing our absolute best. It’s not easy to grow another human being and then be responsible for another life. It’s not easy to raise a child alone or even with help – we all worry that we are doing something wrong, that we will completely fuck up and raise an absolute asshole. Of course we all worry about more serious things but I try to stay away from those thoughts…or at least dwelling on them. Let’s face it, being a mother is the hardest thing we are ever going to do. Why do we have to make it harder on ourselves by tearing each other down. Imagine how strong we would be if we could all stick together and praise one another. Imagine the children we would raise if they could see people being nice to each other instead of constantly hating. 

Being a mother is the hardest thing we are ever going to do…but it’s also the most rewarding thing – now imagine being able to share that with each other. 

Drama kills

I

We all have this idea that drama ends in high school when in fact the drama often doesn’t actually start until after high school. You’re probably shaking your head while harsh memory flood your brain. Let me explain, yes we all have our fair share of drama while we were in school but does any of that matter now? It’s very rare that whatever was bothering us back then is actually affecting us in our adult lives. For the most part, true life altering drama doesn’t start until we are all supposed to be adulting. Yes, adulting. The reason we are legally allowed to buy alcohol.

When you were a teenager you and your BFF no doubt got into a huge fight over something ridiculously stupid. Am I right? Most likely you both vented to your other friends and talked a world of shit…sound familiar? How long did you two actually make it without talking? Eventually you realized that your love for one another was stronger than whatever you starting fighting over and probably forgot all about it by 5^th period. Here I am, 28 years old with family members that probably don’t even remember why they don’t like me. Actually forget probably, if they honestly believe what they are telling my other family members then I know they don’t remember why they don’t like me. Here is the thing – I got my feelings hurt, I’ve cried over it, I was offended, and then I lost all interest. Quick recap…

My sister-in-law doesn’t like me, I don’t know why but she doesn’t. I thought all was fine, there were few snide remarks here or there but I ruled it out as just her personality. Then I got engaged and she told people that “they (here and my brother) were together longer” wow, who cares? They got engaged about a month later and I was thrilled. They got married two months before me – that’s cool, I wasn’t upset. Until I saw her girls dressed in my colors even though I heard over and over for the last couple of months that it was a different color. Eh, okay whatever…annoying but I’m so happy my brother is getting married and is happy. Then Christmas rolls around and my husband and I announce we are expecting – instant ANGER. Hand to God! They were visibly upset, to the point that other family were asking each other if they were fighting. That hurt me. Fast forward a few months and many snide comments and a pregnancy announcement from them (which again I was happy…totally expecting it but happy) – my baby shower/gender reveal. I was basically ignored and my brother spent the entire day making it obvious he didn’t want to be there (go home! I’m cool) and making it all about her…even was trying to make plans for him and the rest of the boys (not including my husband) during her baby shower that wasn’t even planned yet. Here is the thing – I lost it. He was trying to talk over my sister while she was showing me her diaper cake and I told him to shut up. In front of everyone. I know I embarrassed him but what he doesn’t realize is that he was embarrassing himself. Ok, cool so that just happened. Emails were sent, she wrote to me pretending to be my brother telling me that I “never accepting his wife” blah blah blah…I really hate lies. I was thrilled every time they announced something, I liked her, and was happy to have a sister-in-law that I actually got along with. Boy was I way fucking wrong. I simply said that I will not allow myself to be treated so horribly and I didn’t want to be around all of their negativity. Instead of apologizing or trying to stop acting like such cunts I was ignored on Father’s day and then not invited to her baby shower. Okay – I get it. 

From my previous post you should know that I had a rough pregnancy towards the end and my baby spent some time in the NICU. And not a single word from her. My brother announced the birth of son on facebook before I had the chance to say anything…and then had people wondering why I wasn’t saying anything. There is acknowledgement of my son and that is when I lost all respect for my so-called family. I was nice, I was inclusive, I push past all the snide comments and still I got nothing but shit in my face. I extended an olive branch and suggested we talk, but only when they are ready to admit what the real problem is. And now they are telling my other family that she is mad about an email! Are you kidding me? End of recap.

I have two choices. I can let the drama surround me and drown me in negativity or I can stand up and say I’m too old for this. I’m 28 years old, I’m a mother, I’m a wife, and I’m a hard working work from home mom. I do not have the time or energy to deal with this kind of petty bullshit. Does the drama ever stop? No but you can be mature and make a healthy choice to not be involved. 

I know it’s difficult and sometimes you need to vent and get it out. Purge baby! Purge it, scream it, write it out, and then get over it. Forgive, ignore, walk away…whatever you need to do to make yourself healthy. Negativity is toxic. 

 

We all deserve to be happy and if someone is trying to tell you otherwise, whether with words or actions, tell them to fuck off. You will feel much better. Trust.

Is Cheating Abusive?

Is cheating abusive? Well, I believe that is kind of a gray area. I know my opinion may be a bit intense but hear me out - 

The problem is that everyone defines cheating differently, is simple talking to another person cheating? How about if you feel like you have the existence of said conversation? Is it cheating then? Is cheating strictly physical or can it be an emotional thing as well? It’s very important to set the guidelines of what is and isn’t considered cheating early on in a relationship because the idea of cheating is almost always completely different between the two involved. So let’s assume the foundation is set and a line was crossed – you or your significant other cheated. The question I have is do we consider cheating abusive? Obviously someone should never stay in an abusive relationship but we, as a society, don’t look at cheating as abusive. Gross, disgusting, some say unforgivable but in this day in age kind of accepted. 

Put yourself at a table with your girlfriends – your BFF looks you dead in the eyes and says “he cheated on me, but he said it would never happen again” what is your reaction? “That pig!” is hopefully one of them. We never want to see someone we care about hurt so of course we instantly start to talk shit, and rightfully so. But we also may ask – “Are you going to dump him?” “Do you believe him?” perhaps even comfort with the white lies no one ever actually believes “I’m sure it was just a onetime thing. He had to see what he was missing to see the amazing thing he has”. I do know people that were cheated on multiple times and still ended up marrying that person and as far as I know are perfectly happy. Now imagine your BFF looks you dead in the eyes and say “he hit me, but promised you would never do it again” WHOLE different story now, huh? 

One definition of emotional abuse is: "any act including confinement, isolation, verbal assault, humiliation, intimidation, infantilization, or any other treatment which may diminish the sense of identity, dignity, and self-worth” Diminished sense of identity, dignity, and self-worth? I personally think that is rather descriptive of how I felt when I was cheated on. So maybe the real question is do we, as a society, hold emotional abuse in the same severity as physical abuse? With websites like Ashleymadison.com I think the answer is painfully clear. Cheating isn’t considered abusive because we don’t look at abuse as anything other than physical. We don’t pay attention the emotional or psychological harm that is being endured all over the world, every second of every day. 

I have experienced all kinds of abuse, both first hand and second hand, and believe that both physical and emotional abuse can cause irreparable damage. Is cheating abusive? Maybe. Maybe not. But it sure can cause a lot of damage. Not just to a relationship but to the people involved. 

Think before you act.

Surviving the Dreaded Cold

It has been quite a while since my last post and I do apologize but I’ve been trying to survive my son’s first cold. That evil cold bug has been attacking with a vengeance this year and my son was unfortunate enough to not only get it but get it twice. Thanks to day care, switching day cares, and my husband and I passing it back and forth my poor little baby boy has been sick on and off for about a month now. Oh the rollercoaster of bullshit! 

Since the monster is finally getting better I thought I’d share a couple things that have helped us not lose out shit over the last couple of weeks. Here are your new lifesavers: 

Hyland’s Tiny Cold Syrup – I am a huge advocate for Hylands products. We used the teething tablets when the monster was getting his first couple of teeth so when it came time buy something for his cold I of course looked to Hylands. They don’t use harsh chemicals and aren’t as messing/sticky as some of the other syrups out there. 

NoseFrida – The ever popular snot sucky thing. If you haven’t seen these yet here is the gist of it – it’s a tube attached to a long skinny tube and you put one end near the nostril and the end in your mouth and suck. What a simple yet disgusting concept. Trust me, my sister told me about this when I was pregnant and I wanted to barf BUT it works and is so much better than the original bulb sucker. There is a small filter to block any snot/bacteria from getting to you. The tiny filters are a little pricey and considering what they are, it’s a tad insulting but when something works for your sick baby you’ll most likely not care too much. 

BoogieMist – This is a simple saline spray that you should use before the NoseFrida. Saline (sodium chloride) is a mineral found naturally occurring in the earth and body that excels at breaking up and thinning mucus. One spray in each nostril before tummy time or using the NoseFrida and all that mucus will be so much easier to get out. My monster isn’t too fond of it but it helps which eventually makes him happy so I use it. There are tons of saline sprays out there but I prefer the boogie products.

BoogieWipes – Again, tons of other wipes out there but I personally always go to the boogie products. These are delicate saline wipes that are amazing on your LO’s sore nose. I think baby wipes are just too tough and the Johnson and Johnson face wipes have fragrance which just irritates my monster’s already red nose. 

Vick’s Baby Rub – Let’s face it, there is nothing worse than not being able to breathe and imagine not understanding why you all of a sudden can’t breathe through your nose. The NoseFrida can only do so much – think about when you have a cold…you can blow and blow and blow your stupid stuffed up nose and it is immediately stuffed again. I LOVE Vick’s Baby Rub! OMG. First of all, it doesn’t have any harsh chemicals so it’s gentle for your precious LO and it smells AMAZING. When the monster was really bad I put some on his feet, armpits and chest. I know, armpits? I don’t know that it actually does anything but a friends suggested it and her mother is a retired nurse so I went with it. Once he started to get better I decreased it to just his chest. He seems to really enjoy the smell and of course loves the little chest rub, which I did at night and in the morning before school. I would suggest to skip the feet unless your baby is wearing footie pajamas because you don’t want them to get it in their mouths. 

Eucalyptus oil – If you don’t already have a humidifier in your LO’s room, go get one. I have a cool mist humidifier going at night, every night, since he was a month old. But when my monster got sick I put 4 or 5 drops of eucalyptus oil in his humidifier to help purify the room a little. Eucalyptus is a natural decongestant and is often used at spas and steam rooms. The baby rub even has some eucalyptus in it. I think it smells amazing but it can be too much for some people so start off with 2 or 3 drops, depending on how big your humidifier is, and go from there. Trust me on this one, it will work wonders. They also sell those oil diffusers which could work too but I prefer the humidifier and it’s easier for me to just add some oil to the one we already use than to go out and buy an additional product. Also, if you’d like you can add some lavender to it when your LO is better to help them sleep. Some people mix oils but I would just stick to one at a time. 

Sleep – Obviously it may be a bit difficult for your LO to sleep when they are sick. They have no idea what is going on or understand that it will eventually pass. So if it comes down to it, I let my little monster sleep in bed with us or on my chest on the couch. I only had to take one day off of work because he was sick and he slept the majority of the day on my chest. Sleep is really the most important thing when you are sick (in my opinion) so if your feeding schedule gets a little messed up so be it. If your LO is sleeping, I suggest to just let them sleep and let the cold take its course. 

 

This are the things that helped me and baby boy survive his first cold. Please keep an eye on your precious LO and if the cold continues for more than a week call their doctor. If your baby seems to have trouble breathing/shortness of breath call your doctor immediately. There have been times that I called the nurse multiple times over a few days. It’s okay to ask for help or admit you don’t know what to do and honestly, when it comes to the most amazing, precious thing in your life, it’s always better to be safe than sorry. 

 

Good luck!

Don't Hate, Integrate! An Open Letter to Jada Pinkett-Smith.

Dear Mrs. Pinkett-Smith and supporters, 

 

         I just finished watching your childish video despite my severe lack of care for this issue. After days of it being beat into my head by every news network on the planet, I figured it was my duty to finally watch yet another celebrity living in their multi-million dollar homes bitch about life not being fair. And here is what I thought.

 

        First of all, if the Oscars are “too white” please explain to me why the most recognized movie this year is one that was direct by Alejandro González Iñárritu, a Mexican director. Why don’t you say what you REALLY want to – you think the Oscars or “not black enough” and your ridiculous boycott is due to the fact that your husband was not nominated. Not nominated for a movie that I cannot personally find one person who actually has heard of it, let alone watched it. Look, I love Will Smith but this isn’t his year. Sorry. Please don’t scream racism because you didn’t get your way. And please don’t go around throwing white people under the bus because you think something is…dark enough. 

 

       I have absolutely had it with all this PC crap. Since when did we become a country of whiners? Oh, Mrs. Pinkett-Smith your life must be so hard. You are in one of the hottest TV shows, although I personally lost interest in it midway through the first season. I did like your role in Magic Mike 2 however. I thought it was pretty cool to show the role reversal of a powerful women in charge of lots of hot men. So many hot men…oh, okay I’m getting off topic. You have been very successful in your career, as well as your husband and children. I’m sure you all have seen your fair share of rejection, that is after the all the industry. I remember seeing a story where a Meryl Streep was called “too ugly” for a role. You chose to be in this industry so you have to face the rejections – and I for one commend you because I would never be able to handle that kind of rejection. However, aside from someone actually telling you that you don’t get the role because you are black, you cannot go around calling people racist just because you think so. I’m not naïve, I know racist people exist and just a FYI they aren’t all white. And I believe there is a potential for this or other award shows to perhaps show a biased but “too white” is beyond the wrong description. 

 

      And lastly, in your video you say something along the lines of “to beg for acknowledgement is to diminish respect and power” to paraphrase. But Mrs. Pinkett-Smith, isn’t that exactly what you are doing? You are just begging for attention and acknowledgement while you sit in your comfortable, gigantic house that I would most likely get lost in. You demand respect and call for a boycott, however, it is you that chooses to continue with the segregation. You demand to be acknowledge because you are black. Isn’t that right? You want to be treated equal but then demand special recognition because you are black. Call me a racist if you want but there are white actors that were not nominated or have never been nominated and you don’t see their youtube videos whining about it. Perhaps it’s not because they are white but because they are adults. They put on their big girl and boy panties and went back to work just like every other adult in this country, world. As I sit here typing this I have a little over a hundred dollars in my bank account. I own a small condo in a crappy neighborhood and have a husband and infant to take care. I work anywhere from 40-70 hours a week, including early mornings and late nights in addition to caring for my son (I’m a work from home mom) during the days. I have help from my husband when he gets home from work but I am exhausted 24/7. I haven’t gotten a raise in over three years and we barely make enough to pay our bills. So please spare me the “white privilege” bullshit. I work my ass off and I don’t complain. I enjoy the time I have with my family and we make the most of what we have. I don’t cry sexism when I don’t get my way or try to blame it on anything or one. I pull myself up and work even harder despite NEVER getting acknowledgement at work. 

 

***My family is truly a mixing pot – my family consists of Mexicans, Peruvians, Whites, Blacks, Gays, Straights, short people, tall people, fat people (and I’m proud of it!) skinny people, incredibly smart and sometimes incredibly dumb people. I’ve dated Middle Eastern guys, Mexican guys, as well as white guys. My point is that every single one of these people, including my exes (maybe like 85% of my exes), is dear to my heart and if someone treated any of them differently because of race, sexual orientation, or size I would be pissed. I would stand up for each and every one of them until the day I die but they don’t go around calling something it’s not just because they didn’t get their way. 

 

Grow up. If you want to fight for equality, stop asking to be acknowledge because you are “different”. 

 

Sincerely, 

The Inappropriate Momma ;-*